When You Poke A Sleepy Audit...

...you basically get the biggest bitch in customer service ever.

I'm super tired tonight. I may have even had a twenty minute nap that resulted in me waking up scared to my alarm on my phone. I did my audit late tonight, so I was doing paperwork when the past Night Audit chick came in.

Now, this chick has a bad reputation at my hotel to begin with. The things she did that resulted in her termination are as follows (but not limited to, because they never really tell you an actual reason):
-walking down the street to get a coffee and leaving the hotel completely unattended.
- giving free rooms to her friends all the time
- using rooms for her own personal activities while on shift
- not doing the fucking audit
-sleeping
- Not showing up for her shift at.all.
- not answering her phone when she missed an entire shift

One or more of these got this chick fired. It happened almost a year and a half ago. I've been here ever since. There was a two week gap, but the manager was doing this shift.

So this whore walks in, and I'm tired so I'm slow to be polite. I need energy to be nice to people who just exude the look of douchebaggery. She starts in and tells me who she is and how she'll be getting the family and friend discount rate and my hotel manager knows her and blah blah blah blah blah. The amount of bullshit and life story I just received is immense and I don't want to trouble y'all with it.

She then tries to get me to call my manager, and I tell her no way. There isn't a problem. I name a very reasonable deposit price ($100 bucks) and tell her that I'll just hold it, and when she checks out at 11am in the morning she can talk to the morning girl and/or the hotel manager. She balks and starts to lose her shit, but in the most condescending, holier than thou way that I automatically shut down and start to sleep.

With my eyes open, of course.

In my head, I slapped her, told her to wipe the cum off her lips and get the fuck out of my hotel.

In reality, I stood there with a passive agressive "you may have worked here before but I'm running shit now, bitch. Good.Fucking.Luck" look on my face that I've ever been able to pull off. I think she was debating slugging me, but decided against it. I look kind of tough in my jeans and purple striped sweatshirt tonight, I guess.

She then tried to threaten my job, and told me to inform my boss that she'd be coming in to lodge a formal complaint against me. And then she smiled and told me to have a good day.

I of course, said thank you and I wished her the best of luck finding a hotel that would charge her under 100 bucks.

I may have waved. And smiled.


And now I'm going to shovel the snow and mop the floors and do the rest of the paperwork and eat some valentines day chocolates because I'm a spoiled little girl and enjoy this note I'm writing out to my boss.
(My job is no where near threatened, don't worry.)